This section provides you with military jokes. Let’s learn, at the same time, we will have fun and laugh together!
JOKES 1
During training exercises, the lieutenant who was driving down a muddy
back road encountered another car stuck in the mud with a red-faced
colonel at the wheel.
“Your jeep stuck, sir?” asked the lieutenant as he pulled alongside.
“Nope,” replied the colonel, coming over and handing him the keys,
“Yours is.”
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JOKES 2
Submarines are safer than aircraft …..
The proof in this fact is that there are more aircraft in the water than submarines in the sky.
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JOKES 3
During the Vietnam war, a Lieutenant asked a Marine why he was falling back during a really fierce battle. “Didn’t you hear me say that we’re outnumbered 4 to 1 ?”
The Marine replied, “I got my four Sir.”
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JOKES 4
Having passed the enlistment physical, Jon was asked by the doctor, “Why do you want to join the Navy, son?”
“My father said it’d be a good idea, sir.”
“Oh? And what does your father do?”
“He’s in the Army, sir.”
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JOKES 5
The reason the Air Force, Army, Navy and Marines bicker amongst themselves is that they don’t speak the same language. For instance, take the simple phrase “secure the building”.
The Army will post guards around the place.
The Navy will turn out the lights and lock the doors.
The Marines will kill everybody inside and set up a headquarters
The Air Force will take out a 5 year lease with an option to buy.
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JOKES 6
Two army rules:
#1.The commanding officer is always right.
#2.If the commanding officer is not right, see #1.
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JOKES 7
A private asks a sergeant:
– Is it true that man descended from a monkey?
– Yes, privates possibly were. But not sergeants.
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JOKES 8
A general calls a colonel:
– Do you have a couple of smart majors?
– Yes Sir, I do.
– Send them to me. I need to move my furniture around.
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JOKES 9
A guy named Sue
A guy was telling about this girl Sue who disguised herself as a man and joined the army.
“But, wait a minute,” said his friend, “She’ll have to dress with the boys and shower with them, too, won’t she?”
“Sure,” replied the guy.
“Well, won’t they find out?”
The guy shrugged. “Who’s gonna tell?”
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JOKES 10
Fighter Pilots
Q: How do you know if there is a fighter pilot at your party?
A: He’ll tell you.
Q: What’s the difference between God and fighter pilots
A: God doesn’t think he’s a fighter pilot.
Q: What’s the difference between a fighter pilot and a jet engine?
A: A jet engine stops whining when the plane shuts down.
For more military fun and jokes, visit :
Communicative English for Military 